


La petite mort

by PoisonJack



Category: Borderlands (Video Games)
Genre: Anal Sex, Established Relationship, M/M, Modern AU, Quiet Sex, Semi-Public Sex, on the plus they're going to get the house for REALLY cheap now ahahah, well maybe not so much haha
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-13
Updated: 2019-01-13
Packaged: 2019-09-19 18:19:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 732
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17006739
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PoisonJack/pseuds/PoisonJack
Summary: Jack and Rhys arrive early to a house-showing and have a little fun in the master bedroom closet. The sounds of Rhys' moans under Jack's hands makes everyone flee thinking the house is haunted xDOne of my older works from a tumblr sentence prompt meme request:“No, the house is definitely not haunted, why do you ask?”





	La petite mort

**Author's Note:**

> To be fair, I'd be bored waiting for the real estate agent too. But there's just some stains you can't get out guys, come on now xD hehehe

Ten minutes of boredom was all it had taken to get them into their current predicament: Rhys and Jack trapped in a closet of a prospective home, Jack buried balls-deep inside the younger man with one hand over his mouth and the other around his cock. Jack was muffling Rhys’ moans as other voices were heard from within the vacant house.  


The realtor had been late, and Jack had insisted that since _they_ were on time proper– _and_ had arrived before any other prospective home-owners had shown up to the open house- that they could let themselves in for a little private tour.  


It was a big house– nice neighborhood, good school district, a pool, and ample space for a garden- _and_ it had the walk-in closet of Rhys’ dreams in the master suite.

“I think everything we own could fit in this closet alone,” the younger man had said, standing in the doorway. “You could fit an entire bed in here. Listen, it even echoes.”

“That’s the first place your mind goes, hm, kitten?” Jack had asked, and backed the younger man into the closet with a leer. He’d gotten him against one of the walls, kissed him while feeling him up. Rhys had snickered and batted at him, told him to knock it off because what if realtor showed up? But then Jack had attacked the special spot on his neck, and Rhys had gone to putty. Jack’s hands had gone to his pants, and a couples minutes later he had the younger man braced against the wall as he slowly rocked into him.

At first Jack had thought it was his imagination or Rhys’ desperate mumbling that he’d heard, but then they realized the sound wasn’t coming from them, but from somewhere downstairs.

“Shit,” Jack had uttered, stopping his leisurely thrusts into the younger man. Rhys had lashed out at the older man’s hands on his hips and threatened him not to stop. “ _Kinky_ ,” he’d stated, and took up right where he’d left off.  


But now the voices were louder, the tour began, and Rhys kept making low sounds in his throat as Jack worked him deep. One hand was plastered over the younger man’s mouth and the other was around his cock. As the pad of Jack’s thumb brushed over the head of Rhys’ cock, the younger man had moaned loudly against Jack’s hand. The sound had carried.

“And why has this house been on the market for so long?” a voice had come to them from somewhere down the hall. “It’s gorgeous and the price-! Makes us think there’s a catch.”  


“Well, full disclosure: the last owner died. Fell over the railing. It was very tragic,” the voice of the realtor came. “I assure you though, everything is up to code.”

Jack could feel his orgasm building as he bit his own lips, the voices a mild distraction at worst, slightly interesting at best. He sped up his thrusts into the younger man as Rhys clawed at the walls and pressed backwards into Jack.

There was nervous chuckling just outside the room. “So the place isn’t haunted, is it?”

The realtor laughed somewhat politely. “No, of course not.” More polite laughs and now footsteps just outside the room.  


Rhys moaned as Jack’s hips hitched hard against his own, the sound muffled by Jack’s skin and the closet doors. The footsteps paused the voices slightly concerned.  


“It is haunted, isn’t it? That’s why it’s so cheap.”  


“No, the house is _definitely_ not haunted. Why do you ask?”

More odd noises. Very light banging. Groaning?  


“Did the owner die _in_ the house?” the person asked with concern.  


Jack gave a final slam into Rhys as he fisted the younger man’s cock, and Rhys was coming with loud, unadulterated moans into Jack’s hands. The shrieks and pounding of footsteps didn’t register in his mind as he was riding out the waves of his orgasm, head hanging between his arms against the wall. Jack’s satisfied chuckles were in his ears as the older man wrapped both arms around his middle and pressed a kiss to his neck.

“What do you think, pumpkin?” his pleasure-thick voice asked. Rhys lightly laughed, still holding himself heavily against the wall.

“…I think we can get far below asking price.”

Jack laughed himself right out of Rhys. They’d make an offer on the property that day.

**Author's Note:**

> They commemorate the buying of the house every year on the same date by bangin' in the closet hehehhe xD
> 
> [my tumblr](http://purge-that-urge-rhackathon.tumblr.com/) | [my fic masterlist archive](http://purge-that-urge-rhackathon.tumblr.com/post/134979026515/poisonjack-ao3-fic-archive) | [my twitter](https://twitter.com/PurgeThatUrge) | [my pillowfort](https://www.pillowfort.io/PoisonJack)  
> (Just an FYI: you'll need to be logged in to tumblr for my blog to show up since it's marked explicit :D)
> 
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